The Armor of Resentment

As I sit with my own resentment, I listen.

I see that it is armor around my heart, a pattern that once served to protect me, a blistering weapon that burns hot and scorches everything around me.

Resentment keeps us from seeing what is hidden beneath, grief and fear.

We believe our rage is righteous but fail to see that it is fueled by the festering wounds of rejection, abandonment, betrayal, shame, and guilt; all rooted in fear.

It is easier to be angry than to allow ourselves to FEEL our depth of grief, a dark and necessary space for healing and transformation to occur.

To commit to love, healing, and transformation requires that we conjure the toxicity within that poisons our Soul intentions.

I hold with compassion each of these wounds and see the poison instilled in me from others, and what I have also instilled in myself; the rooted belief that I am not safe and worthy of love.

I continue to come back to these inner weeds, unearthing and uprooting them, surrendering them to the fires of transformation so that I may be who I AM, which is unconditional love.

To bring the light of awareness to these shadowy parts, to FEEL them, to hold them with love and allow the armor to fall away rebirths an inner peace and acceptance, an inner expansiveness that is open to give and receive love.

A wise innocence emerges; intertwined knowledge and experience threaded together by a child’s intuitive knowing of how to allow each moment to fall away, to be present, and to dream the world into BEing.

It is a wise mother’s knowing of how to bring love and nourishment to that which needs healing and integration.

Love and transformation are never far away, we just need to open our arms and our hearts to receive them.

And so it is.